Category

Relationships & Dating

Dating, breakup, friendship, love languages, and limerence.

A man sits by a window with a phone, looking out over houses and the bay.
Oct 3, 2026

Autistic Limerence: When Limerence Is an Intense, Involuntary State for Neurodivergent Brains

Autistic limerence is not a crush that got out of hand. It is an intense involuntary state of romantic fixation where one person becomes the center of your thoughts, your mood, and your nervous system. For...

A couple in a therapy session looking at each other while a clinician listens, illustrating couples therapy for resentment
Sep 25, 2026

Couples Therapy for Resentment: Turning Lingering Hurt into Clear Requests and Real Decisions

Couples therapy for resentment turns lingering hurt into clear requests and real decisions. Learn the two paths, schema patterns, and when staying or leaving is the honest next step.

A woman sits in a cafe with a book and coffee, looking at her phone.
Sep 17, 2026

Limerence and ADHD: Why Infatuation Feels So Intense (and How to Get Unstuck)

If you have ADHD and you've ever spent three hours analyzing a two-word text from someone who barely knows your last name, this article is for you. ADHD limerence describes intense feelings for another person that...

Two people in a bookstore cafe deep in conversation over an open book, attraction building through ideas
Sep 17, 2026

Sapiosexual: What It Means to Be Attracted to Intelligence

A sapiosexual experiences attraction primarily through intellectual connection rather than physical appearance. Here is what sapiosexuality actually means, the signs it is driving your attraction, how it shapes dating and long-term relationships, and when therapy helps.

Masochist meaning in psychology: a person pushing a heart-shaped burden uphill toward an open path
Sep 16, 2026

Masochist Meaning in Psychology and Relationships: A Therapy-Based Guide

A masochist is not someone who likes pain. In psychology it is a relational position where suffering becomes the price of love-and it only exists with a complementary other.

A woman in a purple sweater and a man in a linen shirt sit on a living-room sofa talking, with coffee and plants on the table.
Sep 13, 2026

Healthy Relationship Tips: Debunking Popular Advice and Replacing It With What Works

The most important thing in a good relationship is not chemistry, shared hobbies, or perfect communication-it is having a partner who is a willing participant. This article debunks eight popular relationship myths and replaces them with evidence-based tools.

A couple on an evening date at a cocktail bar, one leaning in and engaged while the other glances down at his phone.
Sep 9, 2026

The Penny Method in Dating: How a Disturbing Dating Technique Messes With Your Mind

The penny method is one of the most insidious patterns in modern dating, and chances are you've experienced it without having a name for it. Here's what you need to know to recognize it, understand why it hurts, and protect yourself.

young woman obsessing over her phone needing sf therapy to overcome limerence with bay area cbt center counselors
Feb 3, 2025

Limerence: Meaning, Symptoms, Causes, and How to Overcome It

Can't stop thinking about one person? Checking your phone for their name, replaying every conversation, feeling on top of the world when they smile at you and crushed when they don't? You might be experiencing...

A man sitting at a table using a laptop raises his hand to his head while a laughing woman holding folders, possibly experiencing platonic limerence, waves at him from behind the window.
Sep 15, 2024

Platonic Limerence: Signs, Causes, and How to Cope With Limerence in Friendships

Platonic limerence is an intense, non romantic limerence toward a friend: a fixation where you can't stop thinking about someone, crave their attention, and feel your whole mood rise and fall with how they treat you....

A man and woman sit on a couch, smiling as they look at a laptop screen. With an air of understanding, they appear relaxed and engaged with the content displayed, their shoulders lightly touching—a subtle gesture of their love language.
Sep 7, 2024

Understanding the Love Language Physical Touch

When physical touch is your love language, feeling loved means experiencing hugs, hand-holding, and other forms of affectionate contact. This article explains what the love language physical touch entails, how to recognize if it’s your primary way of expressing love, and offers practical tips on incorporating it into your relationships for deeper intimacy. Key Takeaways

A man is cooking at a kitchen counter, expressing love through acts of service, while a woman sits at a table looking pensive. The kitchen is decorated with plants and kitchenware. Text at the top reads "Acts of Service.
Aug 26, 2024

Exploring the Acts of Service Love Language

Acts of service love language means expressing love by doing things your partner finds helpful. This article will guide you in understanding this love language, helping you identify if it’s yours, and offering practical tips to show it effectively, enhancing your relationship. Key Takeaways Acts of Service as a love language emphasizes practical actions that

A surreal, dream-like artwork featuring multiple bald, androgynous faces against a swirling, ethereal background with eyes and vortex-like patterns, evoking themes of limerence and anxious attachment style in an almost psychological landscape.
Aug 26, 2024

Is Limerence a Mental Illness? Limerence, Anxious Attachment, OCD, and Trauma

If you can't stop thinking about someone and it's taking over your days, you may wonder whether something is wrong with you. This article answers that question directly, then explains how it connects to attachment...

A surreal artwork shows two figures reaching toward each other amidst swirling vortexes, accompanied by a pocket watch, an open book, chains, and floating hearts—capturing the stages of limerence. One vortex is dark; the other is red.
Aug 26, 2024

How to Stop Limerence: The 4 Stages of Limerence and How to Get Over It

If you're stuck thinking about one person day and night and you want it to end, this article is for you. It walks through the four stages of limerence, how long limerence lasts, the signs limerence is ending, and the...

An illuminated heart surrounded by positive affirmations such as "I love you," "You are amazing," "You make me happy," and "I appreciate you," radiates beams of light, embodying the essence of the Words of Affirmation Love Language.
Aug 20, 2024

Exploring the Words of Affirmation Love Language

Words of affirmation are key to making someone feel valued and loved. In this article, you’ll learn what words of affirmation are, how to use them effectively, and their impact on relationships. Whether for a partner, family, or friends, discover how these simple phrases can transform your connections. Key Takeaways Words of affirmation are essential

Illustration of a person stepping off a cliff, with another in a suit pushing them back, symbolizing self-sabotaging relationships.
Aug 18, 2024

Breaking Free: How to Stop Self-Sabotaging Relationships

Do you often feel like you’re pushing your partner away, even when you don’t mean to? Self-sabotaging relationships is when your actions, whether conscious or unconscious, lead to the deterioration of your romantic connections. This article will help you understand these behaviors, uncover their root causes like fear or past trauma, and offer strategies to

Illustration of a man and woman facing away from each other with tears and a broken heart above their heads, symbolizing warning signs of toxic relationships or relationship issues.
Aug 18, 2024

Top Signs of Toxic Relationships and How to Handle Them

Toxic relationships drain your energy and harm your well-being. Are you in one? In this article, we will help you recognize the warning signs of toxic relationships and provide steps to deal with them, whether they involve family, romantic partners, or co-workers. Key Takeaways Toxic relationships are characterized by emotional harm, manipulation, and a lack

Therapy San Francisco and Oakland for envy and jealousy
Aug 12, 2024

Envy vs Jealousy: Key Differences and How to Manage Them

When discussing emotions, envy and jealousy are often confused. Envy is the feeling you get when you desire something someone else has. Jealousy is the fear of losing something you value to someone else. Understanding envy vs jealousy is crucial because it helps us manage relationships and personal feelings more effectively. This article will explore

Two women sitting in a room, one gesturing with her finger while the other listens attentively. A picture of a bridge hangs on the wall behind them, symbolizing the journey they undertake together. One woman discusses treatment options such as EMDR to address feelings of limerence.
Aug 8, 2024

EMDR for Limerence: Effective Treatment and Strategies

Is your mind consumed with obsessive thoughts about someone, leaving you emotionally distressed? If so, you might be dealing with limerence. This article discusses how EMDR for limerence can be an effective way to manage and overcome these intense feelings. Key Takeaways Limerence is characterized by obsessive thoughts, intense longing, and emotional dependency, often lacking

Four colleagues engage in one of the best conversations while holding coffee mugs in a modern office setting, seamlessly using conversation starters to break the ice.
Aug 8, 2024

75 Best Conversation Starters to Break the Ice

Struggling to start a conversation? Check out these 75 conversation starters to make your interactions easy and engaging, whether with strangers or friends. Key Takeaways Effective conversation starters can enhance interactions in various settings, from casual gatherings to professional environments. Specific topics like favorite food, past events, and life lessons help to deepen connections among

A person lying in bed with a furrowed brow, looking at a smartphone while resting their head on a pillow, seemingly lost in obsessive feelings.
Jul 29, 2024

Cognitive Behavioral Therapy for Limerence: Effective Limerence Treatment

Cognitive behavioral therapy for limerence is one of the most effective ways to break free from the obsessive thoughts, checking, and longing that keep you stuck on one person.

Two people sitting on a couch back-to-back, both looking at their phones. The person on the left wears a light green shirt; the person on the right wears a yellow shirt and holds a phone while glancing sideways. Perhaps they are researching effective strategies to overcome jealousy with DBT therapy San Francisco.
Jul 25, 2024

Effective Strategies to Overcome Retroactive Jealousy

Struggling with uncomfortable feelings about your partner’s past relationships? Retroactive jealousy is likely the culprit, casting a shadow over your present relationship. You’re not alone, and there are ways to move past these intrusive thoughts. This no-nonsense guide will walk you through understanding the causes of retroactive jealousy and provide you with practical tools to

An older couple makes a heart shape with their hands while smiling outdoors, reflecting the principles of altruistic love languages in San Francisco couples counseling. The man wears an orange sweater, and the woman is in a white jacket.
Jul 25, 2024

Discover Altruistic Love Languages in Couple Counseling

Seeking ways to build a stronger, more fulfilling relationship? Altruistic love languages in couple counseling offer practical strategies to enhance emotional intimacy through selfless actions tailored to your partner’s needs. This article provides insights on incorporating these techniques to foster mutual respect and deeper connections in your relationship. Key Takeaways Understanding and practicing altruistic love

Two women are standing inside a well-lit room. The woman on the right, wearing a white outfit and a cardigan, is smiling and holding the hands of the other woman in an expression of deep genuine engagement because of San Francisco therapy.
Jul 18, 2024

Building “I-Thou” Relationships Through Genuine Engagement

In a world where superficial contacts are commonplace, building “I-Thou” relationships through deep genuine engagement stands out as a beacon for authentic human connections. By swapping surface-level exchanges for meaningful interactions, we tap into empathy and recognition—the real cornerstones of strong relationships. This guide equips you with the knowledge to foster these profound connections, cutting

Two individuals stand against a yellow background. One crosses his arms in an "X," and the other holds up a hand in a stop gesture. Both are dressed casually in white tops, clearly emphasizing their relationship boundaries.
Jul 18, 2024

Establishing Healthy Relationship Boundaries

Relationship boundaries are key to healthy interactions. They define how we want to be treated and protect our well-being. This article covers why boundaries are important, how to set them, and tips for maintaining them. Key Takeaways Healthy relationship boundaries protect your mental, emotional, and physical well-being while promoting autonomy and preventing codependent behaviors. Different

A therapist with glasses writes on a clipboard while sitting across from another woman who appears contemplative and has her hands clasped, in a room with shelves and a few potted plants. The scene suggests they may be discussing effective therapy techniques and benefits and doing schema therapy in SF.
Jul 2, 2024

Effective Therapy for Trust Issues: Techniques and Benefits

Struggling to trust others can severely impact your relationships and emotional health. Therapy for trust issues helps you understand the root causes, provides tools to rebuild trust, and teaches you strategies for healthier connections. In this article, you’ll learn about different types of therapy and the benefits they offer. Key Takeaways Trust issues, often rooted

many hands coming together to form a heart representing compassion focused therapy in san francisco and oakland
May 7, 2024

Exploring the Power of Agape Love

Agape love is often misunderstood as just another form of affection, yet it’s the epitome of selfless, unconditional love with transformative power in relationships and spiritual growth. This article uncovers the depth of agape love, distinguishing its self-sacrificial nature from other loves and showcasing its significance in shaping human connections and behavior in everyday life.

a bunch of friends sitting together ignoring each other while on the phone needing counseling in san francisco to overcome phubbing
May 3, 2024

Phubbing: The Relationship Intruder

What is phubbing, and how is it changing the way we interact? This article tackles the uncomfortable truth of smartphone distraction during social moments, its ripple effect on our relationships, and practical strategies to combat this digital-age challenge. Key Takeaways Phubbing, the act of ignoring someone in favor of a smartphone, is a widespread behavior

a young women crying and sad over a breakup and needing sf therapy for coping with a breakup.
May 2, 2024

Understanding the Stages of a Breakup

Searching for the ‘stages of a breakup’ usually means you’re in the thick of it, seeking guidance on the emotional path ahead. This article demystifies each stage, without sugarcoating, providing you with the insights to navigate through the pain towards recovery. As you read on, expect to find a clear, empathetic outline of the breakup

A man and a woman standing back-to-back, both holding their heads in their hands, expressing relationship stress.
May 1, 2024

How to Cope with Relationship Stress

Feeling overwhelmed by relationship stress and searching for a lifeline? You’re not alone. This guide on how to cope with relationship stress will arm you with effective strategies to cope with relationship stress, unpack the communication tools needed to address conflict, and identify the support both you and your partner need to thrive even in

happy couple because of psychotherapy in san francisco
Mar 2, 2024

Take Steps Toward Improving Your Relationship

Are you seeking practical ways to strengthen your bonds and take steps towards improving your relationships? Establishing deeper connections requires more than mere good intentions; it entails a series of focused, deliberate actions. A Guide to Deeper Connections This guide provides you with concrete strategies to cultivate healthier relationships through shared values, enhanced communication, quality

cbt for building healthy interdependent relationships
Nov 21, 2023

How to Develop Interdependence in Relationships

Creating an interdependent relationship is the key to creating a strong, lasting bond. This type of healthy and balanced partnership can help foster personal growth while encouraging deep emotional connection. To get started on this journey towards a happy union, it’s essential to understand what constitutes such relationships and how they function in order to

cbt tips to avoid situationships: situationships are toxic because they turn dating into an addictive game
Sep 17, 2023

CBT Tips: How to Recognize and Avoid Situationships

Have you ever found yourself hooking up with someone who seems really into you, but you weren’t sure if you were that into them? Then as the relationship progresses, suddenly you realize you’ve become somewhat attached to them. At first, you weren’t certain whether you were genuinely attracted or even liked them, but now you

schema chemistry and attachment chemistry in dating relationships
Sep 13, 2023

Dating Beyond Your Type: Overcoming Schema and Attachment Chemistry

When it comes to dating, we often find ourselves drawn to a specific “type” that aligns with our preconceived preferences. Sometimes, this type is something we’re consciously aware of, and it works for us. Sometimes, we consciously know it’s not working for us, but it’s still kind of exciting, so we keep doing it. And

a couple using love languages to improve communication and connection
Aug 12, 2023

The 5 Love Languages: Understanding and Expressing Love in Relationships

Have you ever felt misunderstood in a relationship, as if you and your partner were speaking different languages? Enter the world of love languages, a concept developed by Dr. Gary Chapman that offers insight into how we express and receive love. The five love languages were developed by Dr. Gary Chapman PhD in 1992 when

Tools for Healing From A Breakup
Jun 13, 2023

Healing From Heartbreak: CBT Tips to Cope With A Breakup

Experiencing a breakup can be an incredibly challenging and painful time in our lives. The emotions that arise during this period can feel overwhelming, leaving us feeling lost and unsure of how to move forward. However, by integrating tools and techniques from Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT), Schema Therapy, Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT), and Somatic

A woman wearing glasses sits at an outdoor table, smiling at her phone. Next to her is a dating app profile of a man named Charles, 26, holding a dog. She's excited to learn new relationships and dating tips that might help spark a connection with him.
May 24, 2020

Practical Dating and Relationship Tips

It can be difficult to find and sustain a satisfying romantic partnership in the current speedy and technological era. With the rise of online dating platforms and evolving social norms, it’s crucial to equip ourselves with practical strategies to navigate the dating landscape successfully. Effective Tips for Dating and Relationships Whether you’re single and looking

elizabeth overstreet bedtalks abby lev
May 21, 2020

Bedtalks Podcast Interview: Practical Dating

Listen to Dr. Abby Lev share 5 Dating Trends with Stay At Home Orders with Bedtalks Podcast Host and Relationship Expert Elizabeth Overstreet and her partner “K”. Let’s face it, dating can be a struggle. And this struggle can persist even for those of you in committed relationships. The pandemic hasn’t made it easier. But,

kzum radio podcast with dr lev
Feb 27, 2019

Community Matters Podcast Interview

Dr. Lev describes how to create positive relationships Dr. Lev shares insight about interpersonal schemas and how they impact relationships. Click below to listen to full episode KZUM · Community Matters 4/24/17 – Abby Lev on positive relationships

cost of social media therapy
Sep 30, 2015

Is Social Media Damaging our Relationships?

The excitement you feel when your social media post is “liked,” or otherwise validated, is due to the release of dopamine in your brain, which is also released during sex or a delicious meal. Increasingly, our brains are becoming conditioned and rewired to associate this boost of happiness with our online behaviors like social media,