Skip to main content

Relationship Schemas Questionnaire

The following questionnaire will help you determine which schemas are most relevant for you in relationships.

Schemas are core beliefs or stories that we have developed about ourselves and others in relationships. When we are unware of these stories we are more likely to engage in behaviors that create a self-fulfilling prophecy and reinforce these beliefs. Your responses can provide you with insight into your relationship patterns and dynamics as well as information that will help you deal more effectively in your relationships.

Note: This questionnaire is for informational purposes only and is not intended to function as a psychological assessment or a clinical diagnosis. If you have any questions about your results, please speak with a qualified health professional.


We are conducting some cool research about schemas and would really appreciate your participation. If you’re willing to have your results used in our anonymous research studies, please answer a few questions after you have taken this questionnaire. We would greatly appreciate your participation.


For each statement, choose the answer that best describes you. At the end of the questionnaire you will receive your results for each schema and how it may be impacting your relationships.

This questionnaire has 110 questions on 4 pages.


Page 1 of 4

1. I shouldn’t have to accept limitations placed on me by others.
2. I worry whether people I'm close to are being completely honest with me.
3. I do what others want in order to avoid retaliation or negative consequences.
4. It’s hard for me to put my own needs first.
5. I try to hide my flaws from others.
6. I often feel a sense of panic at the thought of losing my partner.
7. I often agree to do things that I later realize I did not want to do.
8. I often need reassurance from others before making decisions.
9. I often feel alone in my relationships.
10. I heavily depend on others for help in my daily life.
11. I must meet my full potential at all times.
12. Most people break promises and/or lie.
13. There are things wrong with me that I fear others will discover.
14. Most people cannot be trusted.
15. People in my life don’t make my feelings and needs important.
16. I have to protect myself or people will deceive me.
17. I put other people's needs above my own to avoid feeling selfish.
18. I often feel rejected by people.
19. I fear that others will discover that there's something wrong with me.
20. It is difficult for me to take “no” for an answer.
21. I am fearful that people will betray me or hurt me.
22. No one is able to provide me with the emotional support and care that I need.
23. I get frustrated when I don’t get what I want.
24. I need to be careful and guarded with people and what I share with them.
25. I often feel that my accomplishments are not good enough and notice the ways I could have done better.
26. I'm not good enough.
27. I feel guilty if I make my needs a priority.
28. I rarely get my way with others.
29. If I don’t do what others want me to do then I might lose them.
30. I feel very different and separated from others.