Relationship Schemas Questionnaire

The following questionnaire will help you determine which schemas are most relevant for you in relationships. Schemas are core beliefs or stories that we have developed about ourselves and others in relationships. When we are unware of these stories we are more likely to engage in behaviors that create a self-fulfilling prophecy and reinforce these beliefs. Your responses can provide you with insight into your relationship patterns and dynamics as well as information that will help you deal more effectively in your relationships.

Note: This questionnaire is for informational purposes only and is not intended to function as a psychological assessment or a clinical diagnosis. If you have any questions about your results, please speak with a qualified health professional.


For each statement, choose the answer that best describes you. At the end of the questionnaire you will receive your results for each schema and how it may be impacting your relationships.

This questionnaire has 110 questions on 4 pages.


Page 1 of 4

1. I often feel dissatisfied or unfulfilled in my intimate relationships.

2. I feel disconnected and alienated from others in social situations.

3. I go along with things that I don’t really want to do.

4. I make more mistakes than others.

5. I often feel a sense of panic at the thought of losing my partner.

6. My relationships feel unstable and unpredictable.

7. I often take on a caretaker role in my relationships.

8. It’s difficult for me to trust my own judgment in difficult situations.

9. Nobody I desire would want to be with me if they really got to know me.

10. I fear that others will mislead or manipulate me.

11. I often feel trapped in relationships.

12. It’s difficult for me to spend time away from my partner.

13. I get angry when things don't go the way I want them to.

14. I am highly critical of myself when I make mistakes.

15. I often feel rejected by people.

16. Most people break promises and/or lie.

17. I often feel at fault for problems in my relationships.

18. Most people cannot be trusted.

19. I do what others want in order to avoid retaliation or negative consequences.

20. I can’t handle my problems on my own.

21. I struggle with standing up for myself in relationships.

22. I don’t get as much understanding and support as I need.

23. I tend to set unreasonable deadlines and goals for myself.

24. I heavily depend on others for help in my daily life.

25. I often need reassurance from others before making decisions.

26. I shouldn’t have to accept limitations placed on me by others.

27. I don’t trust the people in my life to be reliably available for me.

28. I need to be careful and guarded with people and what I share with them.

29. I get frustrated when I don’t get what I want.

30. People are always leaving me.