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The STOP Practice

When you're flooded

For the moment right before you send the text, say the thing, or slam the door.

1. Stop. Freeze. Don't move a muscle.
2. Take a step back — physically leave if you can.
3. Observe. What's happening in your body? What's the situation actually?
4. Proceed mindfully. Ask what you want the outcome to be, then act toward that.

Why it works: It inserts a gap between the trigger and the response. The skill isn't calming down — it's not acting during the window where you'd make it worse.