Bay Area CBT Center · Acceptance and Commitment Therapy
The Bull's Eye
Most people can tell you what they value. Far fewer can tell you whether they spent last week on it. This exercise puts the two side by side across four areas of life, and the gap between them is the whole point — not as evidence you're failing, but as the clearest available map of where to aim next.
How this works
- Write what you value in each area, in your own words. Not what you should value, and not a goal — a direction. “Be a present parent” rather than “take the kids to Tahoe.”
- Rate how much it matters from 0 to 10. Be discerning. If everything is a 10, the exercise tells you nothing.
- Rate how consistently you've been living it over the last month, 0 to 10. This is the honest one. Nobody sees this but you.
- Name the obstacle — the internal one. Not “no time.” What thought, feeling, or memory shows up and pushes you off course?
- Pick one action per area, small enough to do this week.
A big gap is information, not a verdict
The areas with the widest gap between “matters” and “living it” are where change buys you the most. That's it. A wide gap in an area that matters deeply is the most useful thing this worksheet can show you, and it is not a report card.
Step 1The four areas
Rate all fourWork through each one even if it feels irrelevant right now. The area you're tempted to skip is often the one carrying the gap.
Relationships
Partner, family, friends, children. How you want to be with the people close to you — not what you want from them.
Finish the sentence: “I want to be someone who…”
Be discerning — if everything is a 10, nothing is.
Behavior, not intention. What would the last four weeks show?
Push past “no time.” Time is usually the cover story for something less comfortable.
If you can't name the day you'll do it, it's still a wish.
Work, education, and growth
Paid or unpaid. What kind of worker, student, or learner you want to be, and what you want your effort to be in service of.
Finish the sentence: “I want to be someone who…”
Be discerning — if everything is a 10, nothing is.
Behavior, not intention. What would the last four weeks show?
Push past “no time.” Time is usually the cover story for something less comfortable.
If you can't name the day you'll do it, it's still a wish.
Leisure and play
Rest, fun, creativity, hobbies. The part almost everyone rates high and lives low.
Finish the sentence: “I want to be someone who…”
Be discerning — if everything is a 10, nothing is.
Behavior, not intention. What would the last four weeks show?
Push past “no time.” Time is usually the cover story for something less comfortable.
If you can't name the day you'll do it, it's still a wish.
Health and self-care
Body, mind, and how you treat yourself. Includes how you speak to yourself, not just what you eat.
Finish the sentence: “I want to be someone who…”
Be discerning — if everything is a 10, nothing is.
Behavior, not intention. What would the last four weeks show?
Push past “no time.” Time is usually the cover story for something less comfortable.
If you can't name the day you'll do it, it's still a wish.
Where your gaps are
Ranked by the distance between what matters and what you're actually doing. The top of this list is where effort pays best — it's the area you care about most and are living least.
Where your gaps are
Ranked by the distance between what matters and what you're actually doing. The top of this list is where effort pays best — it's the area you care about most and are living least.
Rate importance and consistency above and your gaps rank themselves here.
Step 3Reading your own results
Look at the ranking, then answer these. This is the part that turns a filled-in worksheet into something that changes a week.
An obstacle that repeats across areas is usually the real target — more so than any single area.
One area. Not four.
Your privacy. Everything you enter stays in your own browser. Nothing is sent to Bay Area CBT Center and nothing is stored on our servers. Your answers are saved on this device only — use Clear all to erase them. This worksheet is an educational tool and is not therapy, a diagnosis, or a substitute for care. If you're having thoughts of harming yourself, please reach out to a professional or a crisis line rather than working through this alone.